How Confident Are You?
Measuring Your Level Of Confidence
In order to start working on improving your level of self confidence, you first need to have an idea of where you currently are.
Even though people may think they know how confident a person you are, this is something only you know and should therefore be based on your own opinion, and not those of others.
When assessing your level of confidence it is also important to remember that confidence is very rarely fixed at a certain level.
Rather it is much more common for a person’s self confidence to fluctuate from day to day, week to week or even month to month.
For example, you may be having a bad day today because you didn’t achieve what you set out to do. As a result, your confidence has taken a knock, and is lower than usual.
Conversely you could be having a good day, and things just seem to be slotting into place how you wanted them to. Naturally under these conditions your self confidence is going to rise.
Your Average Level Of Confidence
When thinking about your current level of confidence, try not to think about it in short time frames, like a few hours or a day, as that is not an accurate representation of how confident you really are.
Instead think about your average level of confidence, such as over the past month. For example;
• Have you predominantly been in a bad mood, and afraid to start new projects because you thought you would fail at them?
• Have you been in a predominantly good mood, starting new things and being successful at some or all of them?
As we progress throughout this article, just try to keep in mind roughly how confident of a person you are.
You don’t need a detailed answer, just a general impression so that you can increase this confidence level as you progress through these articles.
Another thing worth keeping in mind is not to expect your level of confidence to suddenly change and make you a super confident person. That just doesn’t happen.
Rather confidence is built up slowly over time through all the little steps you take, rather than the big jumps you try and make.
Assessing Your Confidence Level
Below is a brief description of some of the traits of a confident person.
Read each one of these and try to decide whether or not they apply to you. If not, these are things which you would benefit from working on.
Where Are You Going In Life?
Do you know where you are going and what you want to be in life?
People who don’t know where they are going in life lack self confidence, because they feel there is no direction or meaning to their life. They feel that they will always be where they are, and so they get depressed about it.
What Motivates You?
Think about the things you do throughout the day. Do they motivate you? Do they excite you? Do they captivate your attention?
If you aren’t motivated in life you are unlikely to do things which will build up your level of confidence.
Can You Control Your Emotions?
Are you a person who can control their emotions, and respond appropriately to them? Or do you let them control you, and then later regret it?
People who can’t control their emotions (such as anger) are ruled by them, and end up missing out on many opportunities in life.
How Positive Are You?
Are you an optimistic person who is hopeful for the future? Or are you always full of doom and gloom, with a constant expectation of failure?
People who do not have a positive mindset are likely to doubt their own ability to do something, causing them to either never start or quit half way through.
But be careful with this, because people who only tend to focus on the positive and don’t want to hear anything about the negative, have a tendency to deny reality. In other words, they see only what they want to see.
How Do You See Yourself?
Being self aware means knowing what you look and sound like to other people. Self-awareness is also tied to self acceptance, which is how much you can accept this image of yourself.
People who are unable to accept themselves are by default self rejecting. This mindset can never create a high level of self confidence.
How Flexible Are You?
Are you able to change your behaviour or your opinions based on the situation you are in, or the information you are presented with? Or do you have a fixed idea about how things should be, and are unwilling to change them?
If you are unwilling to change your views and admit that in some circumstances what you currently believe to be true may actually be false, then you will find it very difficult in life to change yourself for the better.
Self confidence comes through learning by experience, and if you always think what you are doing is right (even though it may be wrong) in the end you will never learn anything.
Do You Challenge Yourself?
Do you like to learn new things and challenge yourself daily? Or do you like to stay in your comfort zone, and always do the same familiar things over and over again.
Growth comes from stepping outside your comfort zone. The longer you refuse to step out of it, the harder it will be to raise your confidence.
How Do You Treat Your Body?
The way you feel throughout most of the day is heavily influenced by the chemicals and hormones circulating around in your body.
If you eat junk and do not exercise, your body will suffer and so will your confidence.
So if you are working on your mind, you must also work on your body, otherwise change in your life will be slow or non existent.
Do You Take Risks?
When you are not sure how something is going to work out do you take a risk? Or do you play it safe?
People who take risks in life learn to gain confidence quickly, because they are stepping out into the unknown when most people would have stepped back.
If the risk pays off, then their confidence is likely to skyrocket. If however the risk doesn’t pay off, their confidence may take a knock, but they will also have a sense of satisfaction that they tried it anyway.
Risks are something you have to take in life if you want to grow, and they are one of the best ways of getting yourself out your comfort zone.
But remember, don’t take risks just for the sake of it. Take calculated risks that you feel have some chance of paying off. If they don’t, try something else until you succeed.
What Is The Purpose Of Your Life?
What are you doing what you are currently doing for? What’s the point?
People who feel that their actions have purpose, are much more likely to have higher levels of self confidence than people who see their actions as meaningless.
Having a sense of purpose about your life is one of the most important things you can do, but it can also be one of the most difficult.
Now How Confident Are You?
Now that you have had a look at some of the things which make a person confident, how much do you think applies to you? Here is the list again to remind you.
• Where Are You Going In Life?
• What Motivates You?
• Can You Control Your Emotions?
• How Positive Are You?
• how Do You See Yourself?
• How Flexible Are You?
• Do You Challenge Yourself?
• How Do You Treat Your Body?
• Do You Take Risks?
• What Is The Purpose Of Your Life?
Remember, each of these traits will help you to develop a high level of self confidence.
So your first step is determine what traits you think you have, and then to decide what you need to work on. These areas should be improved gradually, so don’t expect to master them over night.
If you can achieve everything on this list, you will turn yourself into a very confident person who can comfortably cope with the challenges life throws at them.
